I wanted to die

This time last year, I thought I was the happiest man on earth. This time two years ago, I never felt so angry with life. I still had hope, but my heart was dark and my spirits were crushing. I knew things would get better. This time three years ago......I wanted to die. I have come a very long way in life, but it wasn't without tribulations. A wise woman once told me "When you have problems and life seems hard, you cry yourself a river, build a bridge and get over it". Sometimes it's hard to do.....but it's made me the strongest person I could ever be. Life always seems to haunt you.....complicating things. Once you call it haunting....you know it's time to remove it from your life....because it can't be present for your life to be magnificent. I have always been blessed with somebody to support me in my hard times. Keep me even-keel. Remind me that I have something to live for. Three years ago....if I would've killed myself, I would not have experienced some of the happiest moments of my life. I had to purge those things from my life......because it constantly haunted me. Every place I looked it was a reminder. But when I removed those things.....life was great. Light always comes after dark. Things always get better when if you don't give up.

quotes i've grown (and am growing)to live by

Some of these I've heard and now live by and some I have shaped my life in a way...that can be expressed by these quotes. I hope they are fulfilling for you all as they are for me.

"People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway. If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives. Do good anyway. If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. People who really want help may attack you if you help them. Help them anyway. Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt. Give the world your best anyway."- Mother Teresa

"You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly
central and crucial in a life is the relationship to the self. Of all the people you will know in a
lifetime, you are the only one you will never lose."- Jo Coudert

"Aim for success, not perfection. Never give up your right to be wrong, because then you will lose
the ability to learn new things and move forward with your life."
- Dr. David M. Burns


"Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become.
You never know who these people may be - a roommate, a neighbor, a professor, a friend, a lover, or even a complete stranger - but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in some profound way.
Sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart.
Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.
The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience, help to create who you are and who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are sometimes the most important ones.
If someone loves you, give love back to them in whatever way you can, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.
If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.
Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and listen to what they have to say.
Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.
You can make anything you wish of your life. Create your own life and then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.
And if you love someone tell them, for you never know what tomorrow may have in store.
Learn a lesson in life each day that you live!
Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday.
Think About it? Was it worth it?"
- Anonymous

one of many lessons from life

Never let the negative ruin your positive. Thru all the times of hardship and uncertainty, we must always keep our heads up and fight on. Even tho today my feel hard, and cold and unfriendly, there are always smooth and open roads ahead. So when things look rough, never give up hope and faith. Because when you have nothing else, you always have your faith

the question that stumped them all

There comes a time in everyone's life where they stop and ask "what is the meaning of life?" or even a more personal "what is my purpose in life". Isn't that the ultimate question, the meaning of our lives. For instance, was Jimi Hendrix's purpose in life to become successful OR to inspire generation upon generation of guitarist and an entire music genre. Did he have to die to fulfill that?? Was every victim of A.I.D.S purposes in life to contract the disease, die, and build up in numbers only to eventually, one day, push scientist to find a cure? Did my grandfather live 12 years after he was diagnosed his doctor said he could die within six months just to show me to never loose my faith in God? Did a friendly conversation with a complete stranger stop him/her (or even yourself) from committing suicide? Was that person to live and become or help somebody become an inspirational figure? Is it 5 billion peoples purpose in life to do nothing of great importance but just stay out the way of those 1 billion people that will? Was it the mother of Barack Obama's purpose to give birth to him, so he could become president and put hope in a crumbling country and in the hearts of mankind, and to let the world know that anything is possible (and that America isn't racist)? Was the purpose of all those failed musicians, writers, actors/actresses, etc to make room for the ones that would make an impact? I can't help but think that......some people can't look past their failures and loses, although to them it may be bad or horrific even, but what if from that misfortune came success for somebody else? Will people as a whole ever be able to look past that?